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The Flames of Los Angeles
Rising from the ashes
I’ve lived in Los Angeles for nearly ten years, and I had no idea I could see the Pacific Palisades from Silver Lake until last Tuesday, when I was walking my dog and saw orange flames glowing in the distance. I knew a fire had broken out near Malibu, but Los Angeles is so spread out that whatever is happening west of Sepulveda does not affect Silver Lake. East and West LA have different laws, climates, dialects, and political leaders. In Silver Lake, Kamala has been the President for the last four years, right after Hillary’s term, and we look forward to celebrating her second Inauguration next week.
One of my New Year’s resolutions was to stop reading the news. I don’t want to know anything anymore. I want to get stupider. I want to hold a Guinness Book World Record as the dumbest bitch known to man. Unfortunately, like most of my resolutions, I cracked seven days into January.
I needed to rush home and learn about the fires. And by “rush home,” I mean beg my one-hundred-pound dog to move faster. Walking Perci is like driving with the emergency brake on. He’s slow and makes lots of sudden stops.
There’s a lot of false information on the internet claiming golden retrievers are the best dogs in the world, but they’re the worst and will ruin your life, and I can’t wait to bring home more…
