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One Week Down
Only two hundred-seven more to go
Los Angeles is on fire, David Lynch is dead, and Donald Trump is President again.
I hope everyone’s happy.
The inauguration was only a week ago, but time feels like it’s moving in turtle years. And, according to my calculator we still have two hundred-seven weeks left of this.
So, I thought I’d share my thoughts and observations while women are still allowed to have those.
First, I didn’t realize the President had the power to rename things. That’s fucking awesome. If I were President, I’d spend my entire term renaming every object in the world. KitKats would be Conjoined Leg Crackers, parking cones would be Orange Witch Hats, and the moon would be the Night-Bulb.
Besides renaming the Gulf of Mexico to the Golf of America, Trump also wants to rename the tallest mountain in North America back to Mount McKinley, after President McKinley, who didn’t even discover it. The Athabaskans did, and they named it Denali, which means The Great One. I also refer to myself as Denali when I’ve accomplished all of my tasks for the day.
In Alaska, we respect Denali’s name as well as the people who first named it. The only ones aside from Trump who are pushing for rebranding are McKinley’s great-great-great-great-great-great…
